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Tag Archives: Fred Phelps

For those not in-the-know: Fred Phelps invented the Westboro Baptist Church in the mid-’50s. Said church has no actual affiliations with any other Baptist churches, and is pretty widely condemned as a hate group by just about every American. Except for about 70, which is the total number (almost all related to Phelps) of members in the WBC.

Fred Phelps believes that everything bad that happens in America is the fault of homosexuals. Natural disasters, dead soldiers, every time you wreck your bike…is punishment for a nation that tolerates homosexuals.

This has all come to a head in the past decade due, in large part, to America’s involvement in military action overseas. Phelps and his family have used this to exercise their cherished First Amendment rights to picket and pester the funerals of fallen soldiers.

It’s a tricky gray area, indeed. A paradox, even. Most claim that any American soldier who dies in combat, does so to protect his countrymen’s rights – One of those being the First Amendment, which warrants our beloved Freedom of Speech.

It’s the basis for the Fuck the Troops campaign – a supposedly ironic coalition designed to make it apparent how hypocritical our Rights actually are.

Fair enough. I agree.

In 2006 George W. Bush had to sign into law the Respect For America’s Fallen Heroes Act – a really long name for something that basically says, “Leave a 300-foot, 1-hour buffer between your protest and a military funeral.” It should be noted that the act only applied to about 150 cemeteries throughout the country.

So is it possible for our country to have it both ways? To laud our troops and make it okay to say, “Fuck ’em” at the same time?

It is, apparently, if you blame it all on the gays. You see, Phelps and co. have just beaten the system. In Maryland, with Phelps’ own daughter representing their church, he’s won a civil suit brought forth by the father of a Marine whose funeral the WBC picketed in 2006. The ruling, which is to be appealed of course, requires the father to pay all of the WBC’s legal costs.

For the record, Fred Phelps was disbarred in the ’70s for many reasons, most notably because he reduced a witness to tears during a week-long cross-examination, in which he also referred to her as a “slut.” He lost the case.

Most Christians, if not all, are against the actions of Fred Phelps. But I don’t think that’s good enough. Fred Phelps himself believes that merely voicing an opinion is not good enough. He can’t just set up an internet blog and accuse gays of destroying our country. He has to organize gatherings…a physical presence…in order to prove his point:

Every dead soldier is the fault of homosexuals.

Not taking into account human conscience, common sense and decency, he’s been afforded that right.

So it’s not enough to say that Fred Phelps is a closet homosexual, whose religion has frightened him into such a tiny corner (in a closet) that he has no other psychological response other than to accuse all homosexuals of ruining his country. Because it is clear that Fred Phelps is gay.

I'd hump my Bible, if it weren't written by dudes!

There’s a second caption that I didn’t feel comfortable adding… But I’m just such a stickler for freedom of speech:

“Just behind this podium, Pat Robertson has his jowls pressed firmly against my balls!”

So…if there isn’t a way to respect the dead and our inalienable rights at the same time, at the very least we can shame Fred Phelps into submission by posting every picture we have of him sinning and sodomizing and having sex with puppies and inserting bottles of hot sauce into his rectum and – you get the picture – all over Topeka, Kansas.

If daughter Phelps wants to align daddy’s cause with the righteous and make a martyr of her gay dad, so be it.